Wake up. Take a shower. Make lunches. Make coffee for Reza. Make breakfast. Catch up on FB news.. (yeah.. I know... ), wake the kids up.... five times. Argue over outfit choice for Mehri. Try to get Darya to put on something weather appropriate (No honey, you cannot wear your bathing suit to daycare...), try to get myself ready. Swear at my clothes for shrinking while I was sleeping. Fight with my flat iron and hair.. and apply many coats of foundation to cover the dark circles under my eyes from lack of sleep.. all while two kids try to sneak some of my makeup on while I'm not looking. Throw in a load of laundry, pack up... grab keys... set house alarm aaaaaand.... GO. Time to start my day. All before 8am.
Sounds familiar to probably 90% of my friends. The stress of being a mom.... and caregiver, and room parent and doctor organizer and bill payer and laundry washer and dinner maker and house cleaner and... and... and... and.... takes it's toll. Add a full time job which happens to be my busiest time of the year... a kid who suffers from severe asthma.... and a husband who works constantly.... it's enough to make me drink... heavily... EVERY night.
I am always running. I am always moving. There is simply so much to do and so little time to do it…. I began to think about all I do in a day and yet how much I also miss in my kids' lives when I refuse to do less.
On the other hand.... I love my work. It has enriched my life in ways that can't be measured. Every time I walk into my office I'm excited to get going. At the same time, though, I feel pressure. I've noticed that pressure hits its high point every day at about 3:30 p.m., when I start to feel the anxiety rising in my gut. Only 60 more minutes. I have so much to do. I'm way behind. Send that email, quick. Oh gosh, only 30 more minutes. What can I do in 30 minutes? Not much, at least not much that's done well anyway.
Do you have a time like that during the day, your own version of the 3:30 Anxiety Attack where all of your hats start competing for your attention and you feel overwhelmed and pulled in different directions? Is it when you are leaving work because you need to get home to your family but your boss wants you to stay to do something else because his or her boss needed it yesterday? Is it when you are playing with your kids but thoughts start creeping in about how you need to clean the house before so-and-so comes over? Is it when you're taking a shower and forget whether you've already washed your hair because you've been focused on composing blog posts or office memos in your head? Is it when you are so tired at the end of the day that you can barely manage a conversation with your spouse?
Sometimes I feel like I'm giving less than the whole me to everything that's important. I can't do it all. It's not possible to do it all. Yet I've been as yet unwilling to give up "it all."
Meagan Francis, author of the blog and forthcoming book "The Happiest Mom," says she's trying to do fewer things and do them better this year. In a recent blog post, she wrote this:
"I realized that I already know the things I need to do, which is different from all the things I could be doing. And here's the trick: It's more important to actually do those things that need to be done than to pursue the shiny new idea right around the corner ...
The truth is, every day brings with it plenty of opportunities for us to do better -- not perfect, but better -- at small, familiar things instead of chasing down the next new thing that will "make" us more: fulfilled, successful, better parents, more in shape. The more I try to do everything, the more elaborate a schedule I cook up -- the more I slack off, drop the ball, leave things hanging. Because I can't do everything and do it well."
Guilty as charged.
Meagan likens all of the options of things she can do to a buffet where everything looks so good you decide to pile your plate high, later regretting how much you ate and rummaging through the medicine cabinet for Pepto. That's me. I'm not sure how to stop eating, er, drinking from the fire hose, er, doing so much.
So... I'm going to try to slow down. I'm going to disconnect at night. (YES Michele... I AM) I'm not going to worry about all I didn't get finished. I'm going to enjoy life, my kids and all the peace and quiet that comes along with them.... :)
Sounds familiar to probably 90% of my friends. The stress of being a mom.... and caregiver, and room parent and doctor organizer and bill payer and laundry washer and dinner maker and house cleaner and... and... and... and.... takes it's toll. Add a full time job which happens to be my busiest time of the year... a kid who suffers from severe asthma.... and a husband who works constantly.... it's enough to make me drink... heavily... EVERY night.
I am always running. I am always moving. There is simply so much to do and so little time to do it…. I began to think about all I do in a day and yet how much I also miss in my kids' lives when I refuse to do less.
On the other hand.... I love my work. It has enriched my life in ways that can't be measured. Every time I walk into my office I'm excited to get going. At the same time, though, I feel pressure. I've noticed that pressure hits its high point every day at about 3:30 p.m., when I start to feel the anxiety rising in my gut. Only 60 more minutes. I have so much to do. I'm way behind. Send that email, quick. Oh gosh, only 30 more minutes. What can I do in 30 minutes? Not much, at least not much that's done well anyway.
Do you have a time like that during the day, your own version of the 3:30 Anxiety Attack where all of your hats start competing for your attention and you feel overwhelmed and pulled in different directions? Is it when you are leaving work because you need to get home to your family but your boss wants you to stay to do something else because his or her boss needed it yesterday? Is it when you are playing with your kids but thoughts start creeping in about how you need to clean the house before so-and-so comes over? Is it when you're taking a shower and forget whether you've already washed your hair because you've been focused on composing blog posts or office memos in your head? Is it when you are so tired at the end of the day that you can barely manage a conversation with your spouse?
Sometimes I feel like I'm giving less than the whole me to everything that's important. I can't do it all. It's not possible to do it all. Yet I've been as yet unwilling to give up "it all."
Meagan Francis, author of the blog and forthcoming book "The Happiest Mom," says she's trying to do fewer things and do them better this year. In a recent blog post, she wrote this:
"I realized that I already know the things I need to do, which is different from all the things I could be doing. And here's the trick: It's more important to actually do those things that need to be done than to pursue the shiny new idea right around the corner ...
The truth is, every day brings with it plenty of opportunities for us to do better -- not perfect, but better -- at small, familiar things instead of chasing down the next new thing that will "make" us more: fulfilled, successful, better parents, more in shape. The more I try to do everything, the more elaborate a schedule I cook up -- the more I slack off, drop the ball, leave things hanging. Because I can't do everything and do it well."
Guilty as charged.
Meagan likens all of the options of things she can do to a buffet where everything looks so good you decide to pile your plate high, later regretting how much you ate and rummaging through the medicine cabinet for Pepto. That's me. I'm not sure how to stop eating, er, drinking from the fire hose, er, doing so much.
So... I'm going to try to slow down. I'm going to disconnect at night. (YES Michele... I AM) I'm not going to worry about all I didn't get finished. I'm going to enjoy life, my kids and all the peace and quiet that comes along with them.... :)
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