peanut lining..... :(

I'm a realist... kinda.  Can you be a realist and a dreamer at the same time?  Ok.. then maybe I'm not a realist.

I purposely didn't have Mehri's allergies tested for four years on purpose.  I thought that maybe if I gave it enough time.... and didn't inject her with any allergen.... she'd outgrow them.  So I waited.

Our insurance is changing on September 1st.. so now was the time.  So... we called Dr. Rockoff's office (ahhhhh.... Dr. Rockoff... HOTTIE!!!)  *ahem... sorry.  We called his office, made an appointment... and prayed.

Her peanut test blew up her back with hives in less than 30 seconds.  Same with Cashews.... and almonds.... and... and... and..... UGH.  Poor thing.  She said she felt her back get tight.... and made her cry.  I think she was hoping too.... :(

So stupid of me to think it would have changed.  He told me 8 years ago that it wouldn't.  What is it about me that always thinks things will ALWAYS work out??  That happiness will prevail???  That good wins over evil??

Disney?  My catholic upbringing?  Who knows.  What I do know is that I'm sad.  I wanted her to be ok... to not have to worry about eating something on accident.  To not be that "girl" with the allergy.  She's getting older now... and girls are mean.  Enough said.

The silver lining - she's not allergic to shellfish.  I should be smiling.. I know.  But, I'm not.

Thanks to my family and friends for being so supportive.  You know I'll find the positive in this.... tomorrow.

xo